Tag Archives: review

The Internship (A movie review)

10 Jun

Hello Everypony!

Sorry that it’s been so long since I gathered my wits enough to write. Things have been a little wonky here in Equestria. It hasn’t necessarily been okie-dokie-lokey around these parts. But they’re getting easier. I won’t bore you with the details any further–let’s just dive right in to the review!

When I first saw the trailers for this movie, I thought to myself, they’re trying to recapture the magic of Wedding Crashers all over again–this is going to be a disaster. (So of course, I made a point to go see this. I couldn’t look away!) Yet, surprisingly enough, Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn manage to recapture the fun chemistry they had in Wedding Crashers without killing the rest of the film.

The film opens with two salesmen, Billy (Vaughn) and Nick (Wilson) pumping themselves up for what they hope will be a big sale. Unfortunately for them, it turns out their company has gone under and they’re the last ones to know. Defeated and in a rut, they go their separate ways and face their own woes, (divorce, foreclosure, begging off of family, working for jerks) which are essentially the stereotypical whole nine yards of cruddy things someone might have to deal with after losing their jobs.

Billy, desperate to find a job, stumbles across an opening for Interns at Google and immediately stakes out to find his partner, Nick. After a small scene involving Will Ferrel as a huge jerk of a boss, (a moment that feel weirdly unneeded.) Billy manages to convince Nick to go with him to California to apply for the internship in the hopes of obtaining a job with the internet giant.

Of course, hilarity ensues as the older gentlemen tackle the younger generation and the unfamiliar technological territory involved.

In general this movie was interesting to me, especially after having recently taken a course on Generational Diversity. For a moment or two, I was able to see how the generations above me might handle (or not handle) technology, and what the younger generation can teach them. Along the same thought; I also saw what the younger generation (including myself) might learn from the older generation that we seem to be lacking. (People skills for one. Optimism for another.)

All and all the movie was the sort that’s good for warm-fuzzies, big smiles and a happy aftermath of contentment. Sure, the characters sometimes feel very familiar–the Revenge of the Nerds might seem to meet with Sixteen Candles in there somewhere. (Especially when Yo Yo goes wild. You’ll see what I mean.)  Yet, the movie was pretty good about not leaving loose ends, and wrapping it all up with a nice bow in the end.

I give this a four out of five cupcakes scale! Dig into that sweetness and smile!

Never heard of it? Google it.

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Oz The Great and Powerful…Not so Much…

12 Mar

Hello everypony!

Thanks to the string of poor weather up this way, and various other obstacles I hadn’t been posting much because–well, frankly, I was being boring. Trapped inside due to inclement weather, work, and general laziness–I dove into video games instead of my usual novels or films.

Well–I hope you’re super, extra, excited tonight to know that I managed to drag myself out long enough to see Disney’s latest film, Oz The Great and Powerful, last night.

I went into this film with high hopes. It was hard not to–with the super-star line up that included, Mila Kunis, James Franco, and Scrubs Zack Braff. Surely, this was a combination for success? Not to mention that this movie was a prequel to my childhood favorite, The Wizard of Oz.  I had been very much looking forward to what I hoped would be a charming, witty and powerful prequel. But I was about to be mildly disappointed.

The film starts in black and white, an appreciated tip of the hat to the original Wizard of Oz, (which had also been the first movie ever in color!) and the audience is introduced right away to the main character: a con-artist Houdini wannabe called Oz (James Franco). It’s made obvious that Oz is a liar as well as a player who tricks beautiful young woman with his quick hand and silver tongue. Ultimately, that is the most exciting this character gets. The first twenty minutes or so are spent reflecting how much of a jerk Oz really is. His magic is fake, he’s mean to his only friend (Zack Braff) who he claims isn’t a friend at all–but a trained monkey and he’s been messing with the hearts of every woman he seems to meet. His playboy mannerisms get Oz into trouble with the carnival’s strongman, who attempts to chase down and crush the weaselly, Oz. Oz manages to escape in a hot air balloon–but soon regrets this decision as he is sucked into a spiraling tornado.

After managing to survive his encounter with mother nature, Oz crash-lands in–well…OZ. This is also where the movie becomes vibrantly colored. (So much so that it made me cross-eyed. A word of warning–I don’t recommend this in 3D or in IMAX.) After what felt like an overly-drawn-out panning scene that takes in the multi-colored nature around him, Oz meets his very first witch, Theodora (Mila Kunis). She claims she saw him fall from the sky, and starts babbling about a prophesy, convinced that the con-man, Oz is meant to save their world as a great and powerful wizard. Taken with Theodora’s beauty, Oz goes along with her assumption, wooing the unsuspecting witch as she leads him to the Emerald City. On the way to the city, Oz saves the life of an animated winged monkey in a bell-hop suit called Finley (Zack Braff’s voice) who vows to serve Oz as thanks.  Finley soon regrets this vow as Oz reveals that he is not the prophesized king, wizard and savior of their land–but is in fact just a con-man and Oz swears him to secrecy.

Once at the Emerald City, the audience is introduced to Theodora’s sister, Evenora(Rachel Weisz) who immediately reveals herself as the villain. (But not the main one. Spoilers!) Wanting to keep the throne for herself, Evenora sends Oz off on a journey to prove himself and kill the “wicked witch”. Overwhelmed by greed, Oz agrees and sets off without a word to Theodora. Later, Evenora leads her sister to believe that Oz had woo’d her as well, making Theodora hate him.

While on this journey, Oz comes across a village that had once been made of giant porcelain tea-pots. (Yeah, it felt really random and pointless to me too.)  Hearing someone crying, Oz and Finley discover a little china girl with busted legs. Oz helps her and somehow she manages to stick around for the rest of the film. (haha) The three head onward to face who they believe to be the wicked witch. Of course, this is not the case, and they end up meeting a young, Glinda the good witch.

Glinda makes the group realize who the real villains are, just in time for the group to be chased by angry flying baboons who have multiple annoying 3D jump-scares for you to enjoy. (or not.) Glinda helps them escape with her magic bubble, and takes then to munchkinland where she convinces Oz to lead her “army” against the true wicked witch.

At heart this is the whole plot of the film (leaving out the ending of course.) and I was honestly disappointed. The 3D graphics are beautiful but overwhelming, and occasionally overdone. The plot is overly predictable. And the most believeable characters in the whole film were the two animated ones: Finley and the little China Girl.

As my boyfriend pointed out, Sam Raimi is a hit or miss director. This style worked for Alice in Wonderland–but not so much for Oz as it felt too familiar and over-the-top. I would have liked to see more diversity in the “Quadling” people possibly along the same lines as Wicked where they’re frog-people. The plot was tolerable, but didn’t contain many surprises that I felt were good additions to the film. All in all, I could have saved myself the money and waited for this one to come out on DVD.

I give this a two out of five cupcake score. Not so great or powerful.

 

May contain Goodness

Oz–the not so great or powerful

 

“R” you in love with Warm Bodies? A book and movie review

8 Feb

“I am dead, but it’s not so bad. I’ve learned to live with it.”

And I was hooked. This is the first line of Isaac Marion’s novel, Warm Bodies, and right away I felt that I had connected with his main character–who just so happens to be a mildly clear-thinking, witty, brain-eating zombie. If I had to sum up this story: it’s a romance–with zombies. Marion’s novel stuck with me as he narrates a story above life, love and survival from the eyes of someone who is already dead. (well…sort of. )

The lead character, who goes by only the letter R as he has forgotten the rest of his name, is a zombie. He explains right away that the living dead can’t remember their names, their past lives or what it was like to be alive anymore–they only keep going, unable to communicate, trapped within rotting bodies.

This brilliant novel struck a chord with me–and it is obvious from the movie that it struck the filmmakers in the same way–in regard to the lack of human interaction and communication in the present. R poses questions to himself and to the reader as he faces his inner self in various conflicts–like eating people, for example. Although R knows that he has to eat people to survive, he doesn’t like to hurt people. He has inner conflict about it. I suppose that is partly why he was susceptible in the first place to falling for one of the living.

After eating the brain of a boy named, Perry, R finds himself hopelessly enamored with a girl named, Julie. The only problem is that she is alive. Torn between his nature and his newly discovered feelings, R seeks to protect the terrified Julie, and after camouflaging her scent in his dead blood so the other zombies won’t smell her, he takes her back to his home in the airport. Julie is understandably terrified at first, but soon R shows that he is becoming something bigger than he once once. Speech begins to return to him in blurbs at first, hunger for flesh and brains ebbs and his attachment to Julie grows.

I have always been a fan of the unusual point of view narrations–but so far, Warm Bodies takes the cake as one of my favorites. R’s narrative is an exciting combination of poetry, philosophy and gore. I quickly grew attached to the lead character and found myself rooting for him as he fights to change and as Julie rallies with him to find a “cure” to the zombie “plague”. All the while they each face their own version of zombies, both actual and physical as the actual humans within the story begin losing what made them such and emotionally slowly decays.

The film Warm Bodies, does a pretty fair job of picking up on R’s sense of humor–though I would have liked if it retained more of his inner narrative than was given. However, it was impressive how much emotion I felt came across from the actor who played R, Nicholas Holt,despite his lack of much facial expression or vocal cues.

Perhaps it was because I read the book that I felt that the actress who played Julie, Teresa Palmer, seemed to show less emotion than Holt, who was the actual zombie. She didn’t seem nearly as charismatic or lively as she is depicted in the novel: however, the film’s version of Julie has a grittier, older feel–and for a moment or two it feels like the movie version of The Hunger Games. (Which perhaps was the point?)

What I applaud the film most for is the horrific visual of the Boneys, skeleton-like zombies who within the novel are the leaders of the Zombie “hives”. They were truly grotesque in movements and presentations. They even made me jump.

Though, I wish that the film has stuck with the ending given to Julie’s father, General Grigio. It better reflected the comparison between current humanity and zombies, and though grim, I felt was more suitable. But alas, Hollywood loves their happy endings!

I rate the novel a 7 out of 10 on the restless writer scale, and the movie a four out of five cupcakes.

All and all, both the film and novel are worthwhile time-passers for this winter. And for those who love romance and also zombies–these are to die for. (Or perhaps to live!)

Sold by Patricia McCormick, a book review, and Moving to Baltimare

6 Oct

When I visited my local Barnes and Noble last night, I wasn’t sure what sort of book I wanted. The shelves loomed in a labyrinthine maze, lined with books of all sizes and colors as I wandered through them. Here and there, I would touch my fingertips to the spines of books on the shelves, as if this simple gesture would give to me some sense of the story that was behind the cover.

It was there that I stumbled across a bright yellow book with a striking black and white image of a young girl’s face peering from a sari. “Sold” the cover declared in bold plain red text. Drawn to this image, I left the store with my prize in hand.

I started it as soon as I arrived home, and found myself unable to put it down; worried for what might happen if I left the main character alone in the closed pages of the novel.

Patricia McCormick’s, “Sold”, is a striking story about a young girl named Lakshmi who is taken from her mountain home in Nepal under the pretense of being hired as a maid in the City to help feed her struggling family. To Lakshmi and the reader’s horror, she is instead sold into prostitution in India.

The story is written less like a novel, and more like a poetry anthology that interconnects perfectly. Each “Chapter” is  a literary poem that leads the reader along on Lakshmi’s sometimes beautiful, sometimes sad, but always powerful journey. Only 13 when she is sold by her stepfather, the reader is told through Lakshmi’s point of view the horrifying story that is sadly a reality for nearly 12,000 Nepali girls each year. (Figure taken from the afterword) It is by sheer power of her soul that Lakshmi seems to survive and (spoilers!) eventually escape from life as a child-prostitute. We see the young girl’s change from nieve and innocent, to self-loathing, to strong and determined as the novel progresses. Despite the novel’s heavy subject matter, I felt a great sense of relief and hope at its’ close.  This novel is certainly a three out of four cupcakes on the Pinky Pie scale.

Sold by Patricia McCormick

 

On a lighter note: I started my new job this week! That’s right folks, Pinky Pie moved to Baltimare! So far, the work is a horse of a different color from what I had been working on before. It’s tough training, and getting access for a while to all of the new systems I required for my work seemed impossible–but luckily things are working out for the most part.

My new manager seems sweet and somewhat soft spoken. When you speak to her, you can almost see the wheels in her head turning as she seeks out the most appropriate words to use in her next sentence. Despite her soft and careful ways, do not think she is a pushover. Already, I have seen her be firm with people–but always fair. So far, she seems to genuinely want me to succeed in learning all that I can. Meet Baltimare’s Cheerilee.

 

 

The pony who is training me seems very high energy, if not high strung. She is full of knowledge and excited to train me–but isn’t exactly the most patient mare for the job. She also has quite an ego–which for now–I will be sure to beef up as much as possible while we have to work in close quarters. Meet Baltimare’s  “Great and Powerful “Trixie.

To my left the “Great and Powerful” Trixie of Baltimare

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The pony who sits in front of her seems to be the oldest of the group, and also the most cynical. I find her extremely funny and charming. She likes to decorate her desk and provides everyone with candies. So far, I don’t know much else about her–other than that she seems to be harboring some inner sadness that she may be working out. (Still she’s very sweet.) Meet Baltimare’s Mrs. Cup Cake.

Behind Trixie sits a very quiet colt. He’s only there twice a week, and works from home primarily. Compared to myself and Trixie, he says very little–but when he does talk, it’s usually hilarious. He’s very sweet and patient. (Don’t tell Trixie, but I like it when he trains me better.) Meet Baltimare’s Big Macintosh.

So far, everypony is really nice. And I look forward to getting to know them all better. I also look forward to learning more and more about my new position.

Pinky Pie the restless writer–out!

Memories of the Marshfield Fair and a T.K.O’Malley’s Review

26 Aug

My earliest memory of the Marshfield Fair– which has been a tradition in the county since the 1800’s– is a memory that I attach to my great grandmother, Noni. I can’t exactly remember how old I must have been when she first began to take me, but I could guess roughly eight or nine–as I specifically remember not being tall enough to peek into the Clydesdale horse stalls to see them, without help or without pulling myself up by the bars of their stalls. I also remember the Bee keeper stalls, which even now as I am in my twenties continues to fascinate me for reasons that I can’t quite pinpoint. Noni had always been fascinated too. Together we would tromp the Fairgrounds, riding on the rides I was tall enough to squeak on and waving to Noni as I gleefully swung round, and round on them. I even remember that she would pay for me to play at least one game at the Fair to try to win a prize–but I never remember ever winning.

Noni passed roughly three years ago, and she and I hadn’t been to the Fair together for many years before that. For the first time in roughly twelve years last night; I went to the Marshfield Fair. It’s funny how memories come back so quickly and with such force when certain sights, smells and sounds overtake you. It was as if I were small again, and she was leading me around pointing at the prize winning animals, and giving me bites of cotton candy and various tasty fair foods. Her ghost seemed to linger with me for the whole night as I chatted with my friend and his family. I felt a small almost child-like joy as the lights of the Fairgrounds came to life, voices spiraling, laughing and screaming as we passed rides, vendors calling out to people as they passed by to tempt them into winning prizes full of sawdust. One prize I did stop to try my hand at winning–was a live Goldfish. I knew it was a rip-off and that I could buy a goldfish of my own at a pet store if I wanted, probably for less than what it was costing me to try to win one, ($5 for a bucket of ping-pong balls) but it was the excitement of the idea. The sense of old-time charm that drew me to it. And I happily won. Proudly, I displayed my prize–a fat orange Goldfish in a bag, swimming excitedly in a circle–to my friend who snapped a trophy photo of sorts for proof. I knew Noni would have smiled.

My Prize!

Posing with my Goldfish Prize at Marshfield Fair

In entirety, this weekend gave me back a sense of myself that I felt had been missing lately. I woke up this morning to a gorgeous day, and another friend waiting in the wings for an adventure to Scituate. Off we went, stopping only for an ATM, Gas and a quick car wash, we drove into the center of town where the charm of a seaside town has a heavy hold, and people milled about looking pleasant in their Sunday best. It was a sleepy sort of day, and the town moved at a pace that suited this. We wandered past the harbor at first, soaking in the smell of the ocean that I had missed all summer, before heading for lunch at a place called T.K O’Malleys.

T.K O’Malley’s had a typical sort of Irish Pub feel, but with the bonus of having the option of being able sit on the outside patio overlooking the bright, breezy harbor. Entering the restaurant was at first slightly confusing, as there are doorways to the left and right of you when you first walk in–luckily to the left we spotted a cluster of Hostesses sporting blue TKO’Malley’s t-shirts, hovering over the hostess stand and made our way that way. I held my hand up with two fingers, which in any restaurant would generally indicate table for two, but here only got me slightly blank stares, a chomp on what I hoped was gum in one girl’s mouth, and a mumbled, “Inside or out” from one of the hostesses that had her back to us. I looked to my friend for confirmation, and luckily he confirmed we wanted to be outside as I had barely managed to hear what had been asked. The hostesses then handed us a small slip of white paper that read, “Patio Voucher” and told us to head out to the patio. This was somewhat irritating to me. I had worked as a Hostess at Fenway park for a short while,  so I know that  it is the job of a good Hostess to greet customers, direct them to the appropriate table, ask if they need anything else, and alert the waitstaff that they have a new customer. These girls (who were only busy chatting at the hostess stand) did not guide us to the patio door–they only laughed and told us, “Any door out.” and waved us aside. It felt lazy and unwelcoming. Not a good start.

Once we got out to the patio, the confusion continued. More hostesses in blue shirts at another hostess stand clustered, staring blankly at us as we handed them the slip of paper the previous hostesses had handed us inside. The girls asked us how many again, to which we answered two, one scurried around the patio looking at the few vacant tables before coming back looking confused. Then one of them asked us to wait as they went inside, conceivably to interrogate the other hostesses about us. There were just way too many hostesses, and not enough communication. Finally a hostess returned and asked if five or ten minutes would be okay–to which we agreed. By this time we were slightly frustrated. Why had the indoor hostesses not been informed of a wait time for the outside? There appeared to be more than enough of them to run messages, and inside it seemed to be slow.Luckily, it was   only roughly two minutes for a wait and we were promptly seated at a table with an umbrella and menus.

Our waiter was the best service we had received since we entered the restaurant. He arrived straightaway with his clipboard to take our drink orders, (card us for said drinks as I constantly look underage) and scurry off to the bar to bring them back. The beer selection was fair, and my companion and immensely enjoyed sipping them with the cool breeze off of the water and the warm sunlight on our skin as we browsed our menus. The food was mainly a selection of pub foods–and not much to write home about. Though they did appear to have a varied selection of “University” themed burgers. Should I ever return there–I will probably investigate these. The main draw of TKO’ Malley’s has to be it’s prime waterside spot.  As we were waterside, I craved fish and took part in their Cape “COD” Ruben sandwich, which was a cod filet on rye with thousand island dressing, coleslaw and a slice of cheese. The portions were HUGE and I only managed to finish half of the sandwich but it wasn’t bad. The dressing and slaw were tasty, though the fish seemed a little mushy and was probably less fresh than I would have hoped. What the fish lacked–the slightly toasted bread made up for in crunch and flavor. My friend and I also shared a basket of sweet potato fries which were served with Maple syrup–but I wouldn’t recommend having these with the Syrup. The fries are delicious on their own–and unless you’re a big  Maple Syrup person–the Syrup overpowers the fries taste.

Prices were fair when the bill came, and we tipped our friendly and helpful waiter well. We were pointedly ignored by all of the hostesses on our way out. I couldn’t help but think of how easy it would have been to dine and dash had I been that sort of person. They wouldn’t have even noticed us.

All and all, the day was wonderful and easy-paced. Full of winding seaside roads, looming gorgeous houses, and even a stop at a historical lighthouse. I returned home sleepy but full of a bubbling happiness that only a day near the shore can bring.

 

 TKO ‘Malley’s website link in case you would like to check it out for yourself.

More information on the Marshfield Fair.

ParaNormon Paraphrased: A Movie Review

19 Aug

Norman isn’t normal–in fact–he’s paranormal–as the trailers would have you believe. My  little brother and I, both avid fans of movies such as Coraline, Corpse Bride and of course, the classic stop-animation recollection from my childhood, Nightmare Before Christmas decided that we absolutely had to see ParaNorman. In the dark of the old-fashioned Cameo Theater in Weymouth, we munched happily on candies and waited eagerly for the film to start. The best part? I only paid $5 per ticket for this lovely Sunday Matinee–and aside from my kid brother and myself, there was only four other people in the entire theater. But come the end of the film we found that ParaNoraman slightly missed the mark, and pales in comparison to our other stop-motion favorites.

Following the recent trend of Gothic looking characters and backgrounds in stop-motion, Paranorman opened up right away with our main hero, Norman, watching an old-time cheesy Zombie movie with his grandmother, which gives the audience a sort of foreshadowing as to what sort of mischief Norman will lead the audience into later. Norman is called into the kitchen by his parents to take out the trash and is asked by his Grandmother to ask them to turn up the heat, as she’s terribly cold. Norman scoots off to his parents in the kitchen–and the audience is straight away confronted with the aggressive, non-supportive father figure and the over lovey feeling mother character.  When Norman asks for the heat to be turned up for his Grandmother–it’s explained that his Grandmother is dead. His Father, it is made clear in the first few moments of the movie, and regularly enough throughout the film to make me dislike him, thinks Norman is a freak. His  older sister Courney, seems to agree. His mother takes a more open-minded, but level approach–but is almost to the point of being unbearably understanding throughout the whole film. All the same, this scene makes it clear to us that Norman can see and speak to the dead. That’s about where the charm in this movie ended for me.

Unlike it’s predecessors, ParaNorman stuck with an extremely modern undertone throughout the whole film. The old-timey, good-old-days charm that films such as Coraline or Corpse Bride held are essentially lost in ParaNorman. I believe it is for this reason that the film just didn’t give off that same feel-good vibe that we had come to expect. Like the Corpse Bride, the movie takes a long look at death–a rather weighty subject for most adults, never mind children–but the constant heaviness that comes with it, the constant battering of negative comments at Norman the main character and the ultimately dark lesson of accepting others cruelness as their fear, accepting whatever that makes them do to you and moving on made this film really not sit well with me.

On the plus side, the animation in this film is really well done. Compared to the stop-go motion of old, like Gumby and Pokey, it’s amazing to see how far stop-go animation has come. Most things look impressive and rather realistic as far as stop-go puppets go. Also, this movie is really genuinely trying to reach out to the newer generation. (Just in a rather negative scope.) Bullying is a major focus of the film, as is the acceptance of people different than you. ( Spoiler! The biggest reach out was that Mitch turns out to have a boyfriend.)  But other than that the movie is very much real to life–people are mean to each other, people are stupid, people judge and life tends to be crap–which isn’t what I personally go to see an animated film for. And I expect wasn’t what my kid brother had hoped for either. He put it best to sum up this movie when I asked what he had thought when he said,

“It was okay.” with a shrug of his shoulders.

On the Suddenleighanyonymous scale this movie rates a three out of ten. Another wait for DVD or rental or if you can avoid spending more than $5 on a movie ticket.

 

Take a Hike Magic Mike (Spoilers Kinda!)

22 Jul

As I’ve been mainly engrossed in this month’s JulNoWriMo challenge and trying to get my word count on par–I haven’t had much time for updating this blog and for that I’m rather sorry. What’s worse is that I’m behind on my word count, and instead of bulking that up I feel burnt out on it–and decided to write for all my loyal fans again! -fanfare-

As my boyfriend is away for a Wedding in Georgia, and I’ve been left to my own devices, I found myself this past Friday night itching for plans. And plans came in the form of a girls night out. And girl night out came…with strippers.

No, now don’t get all hot and bothered on me now. I’m of course refeering to the new movie featuing Channing Tatum and Matt McConaughey, playing  male strippers from Tampa in Magic Mike.

Now, frankly, this is not a movie I would normally go out of my way for. I am proud to admit that I am not one of those girls who constantly fantasize about intangible almost fictional human beings called, “Celebrities”, and am not so proud to admit that even shopping in Victorias Secret sometimes gets me flustered. This movie, was not made for girls like me. This movie WAS made for girls like some of my best friends who were eager to lay their eyes on the half-naked Tatum, especially when there was tell of being able to see his back side on the bear side.

For all of you flesh hungry ladies (or gentleman–I don’t judge) this film did not disappoint. Within the first five minutes of the movie, Tatum’s bottom takes center stage. As do a pair of female breasts. That’s right ladies and gentleman–this is practically porn! Although not the most nudity, or sexuality I’ve seen in a film to date, it does really push the line between what’s okay and what’s uncomfortable. Frankly, I know I will never be tempted to head to a male strip club any time in the near future just based on what happened to the ladies who dared to set foot in the club called Xquisite in Magic Mike. I have never liked the idea of being dry humped in the eye–but if that’s your thing by all means be my guest.

The story line is sort of flaky at best–a male stripper (Tatum) has a dream of leaving his nude-lifestyle behind and making custom furniture. (Already sounds like the plot to a bad porn right?) But due to his mainly cash not credit income source, his credit doesn’t look good to the banks and he can’t seem to get any loans to get his business off the ground. Meanwhile, he meets a character he called, “The kid” who is a 19 year old former football scholarship kid who lost it all in a fist fight who is looking for work. Ta-da! Magic mike to the rescue, takes “The kid” to strip in his club. From there, drugs, sex and the expected maddness ensues. Meanwhile, “The kid”‘s big sister asks Mike to look after her little brother, which he of course fails to do (duh) but which somehow leads to a romantic relationship between the sister and Mike. (Spoilers kinda!)

All and all–I liked the dance scenes in this film. But only the ones where they did not end with half-naked men on the screen. I would not ever see this film again, as it was probably more traumatic for me than seeking out sexy panties at Victoria’s secrets and having one of the sales girls ask if you were finding everything okay.

Ladies–if you’re looking for bad porn you can get it for free on the web. If you want some glitter and celebrities in your porn, go see Magic Mike.